WHV US->NZ, advice needed
I want to keep this brief, not super depressing, and relatively anonymous. I’m doing a working holiday visa in a beautiful place and I got here a week ago. I came back to the town where I studied abroad at last year and have seen my friends who I’ve missed. I’m doing a farm stay with a lovely family. But for the past few nights I’ve had unrelenting nightmares that have kept me up all night. Hanging out with my friends, one who I’ve had a crush on for a year, was great....but I feel like such a damn outsider. Nothing has gone wrong, everything has worked out pretty perfectly so far to be honest. Maybe it’s the lack of sleep and maybe it’s just the ride of culture shock, but I’m so fucking depressed right now. I wake up and I want to ball my eyes out. I want to dig a hole and fucking bury myself in it. It’s not being away from my family and friends, this time around the homesickness isn’t what it was before. I know they’re back home and happy which gives me some peace. It’s me, I feel so lost. And no the answer isn’t going back to my country because the thought of that is unappealing and feels like a step backwards. Perhaps time is the only thing to fix this. Yeah I’m extremely grateful I’m here and made this leap and don’t want to sound like privileged person whining, I just haven’t felt this down in a while and it’s killing me.
I guess for the people who have gotten out on their own, how have you overcome the wave of depression that comes crashing down on you?
Submitted May 23, 2019 at 08:38PM by rebecca_alexandria95 http://bit.ly/2WtisXi
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