My experience solo traveling as socially anxious person
Hey everyone! I just returned from a 2-week solo trip in Europe. I wanted to share my experience and encourage anyone else who deals with social anxiety to give this a go.
I have a difficult time making friends, and would consider myself quiet/shy. I decided to go to Europe for a few weeks because I am about to start working a full-time job. When I arrived at the first hostel, I nearly had a panic attack because I didn't think I was capable of doing it. There were people socializing all around me and I just could not bring myself to join in. I had so many negative thoughts, such as "you've never going to be the person you want to be". So for a few days, I was just traveling around by myself and still had a nice time. Eventually I built up the courage to join in on a bar crawl my hostel was doing, and it was a great time! Later, in a new location, I was at a particularly good hostel that was excellent for solo travelers (90% of people were also solo, and lots of social activities). I had an incredible time and made so many friends. I can't imagine ever traveling any other way, solo travel is the way to go. It's the perfect combination of being social/meeting new people and recharging/doing your own thing. I cannot wait until my next trip, and honestly since returning to the states I've been a bit depressed because I miss it so much.
I thought I would write down a few tips for anyone who is also socially anxious.
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Don't be afraid to try and fail. After a while there I got more comfortable talking to people and asking them basic questions like "So where are you from?". Most of the times this would go great and it would spark a new interesting conversation. Sometimes people just aren't interested in you, that's okay. Don't dwell on it.
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I've found it's okay to be honest about your shyness. Saying things like "I'm trying to force myself to socialize" or "I'm working on coming out of my shell" seemed to work well, people were very cool about it and welcoming.
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Weird tip: I was wearing a brightly colored scarf, and this seemed to really stick in peoples minds. Most people are meeting many people per day and may forget your name, but they remembered my brightly colored scarf. For example I was at a bar crawl and I asked these girls "so which hostel are you staying at?" and they said "the same one as you! I recognize your scarf!" which relieved some tension and made conversation easier.
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Some may not like this tip, but alcohol helps. I'm not saying it's the only answer, but it really helps me relax. I've found it was best to meet people initially during a bar crawl, then you have established rapport and can maybe do something the next day. Plus you can talk about the bar stories from the night before!
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If you're an introvert, give yourself time alone or time to nap. I really need this personally, so I made sure that I would give myself entire days or even just a few hour nap mid day to recharge and spend time alone.
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Spend time in the common areas, even if you're just doing your own thing, but not with the expectation of socialization happening. For example I would read in the common areas or just get on Reddit, this would sometimes lead to running into people or meeting new people.
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Try to remember peoples names. Seriously, people really appreciate this, especially when you use it while talking to them. It can be hard, you're gonna meet a ton of people.
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Be a good listener. If you're socially anxious you may sometimes not know what to say. Ask about them. People love talking about themselves.
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Don't forget - you will likely never see most of these people again. Don't be afraid to look dumb/be rejected. This is like a clean slate, and is the perfect opportunity to practice talking to people.
I hope anyone who is hesitant to solo travel or anyone who is gonna solo travel and not try to be social will reconsider. It can be an incredible experience. My experience wasn't perfect, I made a fool of myself a couple of times and there were days that I felt lonely. But overall it was extremely positive and I can't wait to do it again. I really think it helped me come out of my shell.
Submitted January 27, 2019 at 11:02PM by PM_ME_YOUR_MECH http://bit.ly/2TiNn3s
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